It is possible to lead a high-quality life with dementia. You and your loved one can still experience joy, connection, and purpose. The holiday season can bring special opportunities for sharing and togetherness, but it can also bring stress and a sense of loss because of the changes your loved one has experienced. Here are some tips for making the most of your time with family and friends during the holiday season.
• Communicate in advance. Prior to visits, let friends and family know what to expect about how the disease is impacting your loved one. Make sure they understand that changes in memory or behavior are caused by the disease, not the person.
• Adjust expectations. Scale back on large gatherings, especially at night, as many people living with dementia can become confused or agitated in the evening. Share what you can or can’t do with family members. Sometimes it’s hard to give up something you’re known for, like making a special meal. But, it can give others the opportunity to start a new holiday tradition. Give yourself permission to do only what you can safely and reasonably manage.
• Ask for help. Be like Santa. Make a list! Include items like making a meal, picking up prescriptions or groceries, or visiting with your loved one so you can go to a holiday event or spend some time alone. Self-care is more important than ever during the holidays.
• Look for simple opportunities to engage with your loved one. Sort socks, look at photo albums, arrange flowers, or drive to look at lights. Stimulating the senses can help trigger fond memories. Watch favorite holiday movies, smell a pine branch, or sing along to a Bing Crosby song. Let go of activities that feel overwhelming.
• Minimize decorating stress. Hold off decorating until you are ready. Tone down your decorations. Choose a few select items. If you have a tree, simplify with lights and larger ornaments at eye level. Avoid lighted candles, artificial fruits, and blinking lights.
For a list of gift suggestions for a loved one living with dementia, or for caregiver support, call Valley Program for Aging Services (VPAS) at 540-261-7474.
